I have many friends and family members that believe that they should have kids. Each and everyone of them have their own reasons. And those reasons are very valid – for them. And I respect their choice to fulfill their life’s calling.
For me, I believe that I am a very patient, caring, understanding and an intelligent person who quite possibly might rear some great children. But truthfully speaking, I have quite a few reasons why I choose not to have kids. Here are my reasons for choosing a childfree lifestyle:
- Too much responsibility – I do not want to create someone that I will have to dedicate the rest of my life to. Being responsible for my own life is already a lot to be responsible for.
- Relationships are important – I believe my partner and I should be mutually involved and not have to dilute our love and attention to make a new “family”.
- Career focused – Making money is great, but I want to gain the knowledge and respect that makes me a star in the workplace.
- No drive – Changing diapers, teaching morals, the constant mental strain, etc. does not sound appealing to me. Therefore I choose not to opt-in.
- Have fun – Ultimately my moral in life is “do what makes me happy”. If traveling, working, sleeping in and spoiling my partner and friends are things that makes me happy, then that’s what I plan on doing for the rest of my life.
Disclaimer: These are my own personal reasons. I respect you and your life, but just because I might not have the same views as you, doesn’t mean your views are for me. Please respect & be open minded.
To further help you understand my view I will speak on a very familiar note to parents…Since my parents made very many sacrifices to provide for me, I also think it is fitting that I live the life that they couldn’t have because they did things for the good of the Family. My parents want me to succeed and be happy in life, and I plan on doing just that. But my definition of being successful and happy is different then others. So why is my choice to “do nothing” so offensive when really I’m doing what I was created to do?
I really truly COMPLETELY agree with your reasons. I don’t want children either, and the ONLY person who hasn’t insisted I’ll change my mind is my father, who told me that as long as I was happy, he didn’t care about grandchildren.
Gabby,
That is fantastic news! I am happy that there is at least one person on your side within your family. Because you’re dad might help you deter agro during the dreaded family parties. This ally particularly comes in handy when you’re not in the same room… when family usually likes to talk about other people. :o/
I just read a book called Nobody’s Mother…it’s pretty great and goes along with many of your points.
Thank you for the book recommendation. I will have to look into it because I haven’t been able to find a good “pro-childfree” book. The ones I find are written for childless persons or from an authoritative position by parents. Just not the same.